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Saturday, July 30, 2011

What Have We Been Up To?

            So, I bet you’re all wondering what has kept me busy the last month and a half.  Well, nothing much.  We went to Moses Lake for the Justesen Reunion, I caught a cold, we went to Othello for the Robbins Reunion, and then Ty caught a cold.  So, yup not much going on.
            Oh yeah, one more thing, I’m PREGNANT!!!  I’m currently 12 weeks along.  Um, can you say crazy?  But yes it’s true.  Mostly, this whole time my thoughts have swayed between either, “Holy crap, HOLY crap, HOLY CRAP!!!” and “I can’t believe this is really happening.”  It’s been overwhelming and just all around nuts.  I’ve been so anxious to tell everyone I thought I would burst.  

            Okay, story time.  I was reading my scriptures (the Book of Mormon to be exact) and read in Ether chapter 12 about how the Lord doesn't give us miracles until after we show faith.  

Vs. 16 & 18:
"Yea, and even all they who wrought miracles wrought them by faith even those who were before Christ and also those who were after."
"And neither at any time hath any wrought miracles until after their faith; where fore they first believed in the Son of God."

              Maybe it’s because I have been hoping to get pregnant for such a long time, but this really stood out at that time to me.  It made me think, “How much faith have I been showing to my Heavenly Father?”  Then I kept reading on, and read in verse 27:
for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.”   
           Once again, I felt impressed that these words were for me right at this time since I certainly felt weak in this area.  From that point, I decided to do my part, but leaving the rest up to the Lord completely.  I think I tried doing this before, but realistically I have a really hard time letting go of control and expecting miracles.  Somehow the words I read gave me the help I needed to feel ready to let go. 

                I didn’t want to expect immediate results.  Three years of hoping and wishing, only then to turn around and receive negative news taught me not to.  One Monday morning (my weigh in day) I woke up and decided that I should wait at least a week to test since I was only late by a day.  However, my subconscious had already made other plans and without thinking about it I pulled out a test (because I’m that neurotic about getting pregnant that I had pregnancy tests on hand).  I thought, “Well, I guess I am taking a test today.”  I laid the test off to the side and got ready to weigh myself.  It was mostly in passing, but I glanced over at the test just before getting on the scale and already there were TWO lines!!  “Um, that was fast!!”  What the what?  Instantly, I could have cared less what my weight was.  Regardless, after reveling for a bit, I did weigh in and it showed that I hadn’t lost anything (I weighed in later and I did in fact lose 1.5 pounds), but it didn’t matter.  There was something else to be celebrating.  Though, I now realized I would probably have to wait even longer before buying new clothes since I would probably be fitting back into my old ones pretty soon....well the pants anyway.

                It was pretty early that morning when I woke up and Ty was still sleeping.  I waited, somehow mustering the patience and will power to not pounce on him and wake him up immediately.  An hour and half later, he was awake.  I gently laid next to him.  He asked me how I was doing and I made a face and did the sign for “so-so”.  “Why’s that?” he asked me.  “Well, I weighed myself this morning and I didn’t lose anything,” I answered.  He said he was sorry and I said, “That’s okay.  I’m going to be gaining quite bit soon anyway.”  “How do you know that?” he teased, with a knowing tone.  I told him a little birdie told me.  I then explained what happened earlier and we were both excited, albeit sleepy.

                In the beginning, I was really just tired and exhausted.  However, even though my workouts suffered I still managed to lose the rest of the weight and made my goal.  For those of you who will chastise me for continue doing so, I will tell you that I was safe about it and since I was in the very early stage it was all right.  At any rate, I ended up losing 5 lbs. and gained 1.5 of it back from splurging a little too much too quickly afterward so it wasn't like crazy dieting.   I wouldn’t do anything to jeopardize this little life.  Since making my goal, I’ve been able to maintain that weight through being sick and having barely enough energy.  About week seven, I started getting really nauseous and let’s just say I’m glad the bathroom is so close to our bedroom.  Hopefully, that will end soon.  I will be seeing a Midwife, who is also a Naturopath, and my goal is to have a natural water birth at home.  I definitely plan on documenting my visits and what I’ll be going through so those of you who are interested and/or don’t know much about it will be able to see what it’s all about. 

                Being able to tell all of our immediate family and a couple of my good girl friends, has been overwhelmingly joyous considering we’ve been hoping to do our part to expand each side for such a long time.  Sadly, only a few days after we told my parents, they left for Germany for 5 weeks and I’ve been really missing my mommy, particularly during the times when I feel really sick.  However, they’ll be home in a week and a half and I’m hoping I’ll have a nice little pooch for them to see.  

                There have been so many times that this has seemed all so surreal.  Do you remember that time I wrote that post about how I couldn’t wait for my turn?  You may or may not know this, but I suffered a miscarriage about two years ago and wrote about what I went through in a post on a blog I started to vent about such things.  How different I will be ending the year compared to how I started it.  Even though I’ve been sick and tired and tired of being sick, I’m so happy and feel so blessed.  My Heavenly Father really knows me and when I need things. 

                  Both of our families will be blessed with a plethora of babies this next year.  Four on Ty’s side (two of which are twins) and two on my side, including our little Robbins Egg, within four months.  So you can rest assured the Justesens and Robbins are doing our part to contribute to the recent baby boom.  On a little more serious note, I’m so glad that my baby will have cousins so close them in age.  It’s been one of the things that has always bothered me about not having kids earlier.  However, no need to worry about that with this one.

                I’m not sure I’ll be posting all that much more regularly now that the news has hit the presses, but I’ll do my best to have more of a life to document.  ;)  Once the little egg has hatched, I’m sure I’ll be giving you an overload of how cute and adorable they are and how I have THE best baby in all the lands.  Don’t lie, you are all looking forward to it.  With any luck, all my children will have the disposition of their father and really will be good babies.  If they are anything like me……well, we are in trouble and I’ll die of stress.

                Now I'll leave you with my first belly shot.  Just so we are clear, if you see a pooch, that is not pregnant belly.  It's normal Jenny belly.  These was taken when I was barely 6 weeks along.  Hopefully, I'll develop one soon, but for now, I pretty much look the same as I haven't gained or lost anything since then (thanks to the nausea).  Enjoy!

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